Will someone send me a fucking Four Loko?

Riobamba 986, Piso 8

CP: (116000) Capital Federal

Argentina

This basically sounds like only the greatest thing in the 21st century. I've been reading articles about it for the last two months and the damages it causes to whole families but it only makes me want it more. Four Loko is to me what the '67 Shelby GT was to Nicolas Cage in Gone in 60 Seconds. It's my unicorn.

As of today it looks like it is the end of the road for Four Loko in Massachusetts and I have not had the chance to taste its sweet sweet nectar. Shouldn't the Massachusetts police be concentrating on preschoolers with 17 bags of crack in their shoe and women getting beat and killed in Chelsea over ricotta cheese during monday night football? (ps. if you read that article, the best part has to be the cameo by the homeless friend.).

I say Let the boys play

update: 11/17/10

Someone really now has to send me a four loko or put a box with two (in case I want to try mixing) of each flavor away for me. Be my Noah and his ark.

Chicago - In a surprise move designed to head off an anticipated FDA ban on caffeinated alcoholic drinks, Chicago-based Phusion Projects announced Tuesday that they are going to remove caffeine from all their drinks, including Four Loko.

"We have repeatedly contended - and still believe, as do many people throughout the country - that the combination of alcohol and caffeine is safe. If it were unsafe, popular drinks like rum and colas or Irish coffees that have been consumed safely and responsibly for years would face the same scrutiny that our products have recently faced," the company said in a statement .

“We are taking this step after trying - unsuccessfully - to navigate a difficult and politically-charged regulatory environment at both the state and federal levels," the statement continued.

Phusion is also going to remove other energy-drink ingredients from Four Loko, including guarana and taurine.

While there is little known medical evidence that the drinks are less safe than other alcoholic drinks, public health advocates say the drinks can make people feel more alert and able to handle tasks like driving. A Wake Forest University study found that students who combine caffeine and alcohol are more likely to suffer alcohol-related injuries than those drinking alcohol without caffeine.